It’s true! You cannot change past events. What you can change, however, is how you think and feel about the past. When you change how you think, the present changes, and the future has new possibilities.
In the past you were a child or a young adult and you did not have the adult self you have now. It can be very valuable to explore past events with your memory of the event (your younger self) and with the experience and knowledge of life of your current-age self. By doing so, you can often achieve a new perception of past events. This often changes how you think and feel in the present.
Self-esteem is a by-product of how you treat yourself. When you treat yourself badly, you feel worse about yourself. When you treat yourself well, you feel better about yourself.
People often ‘beat themselves up’. Sometimes one’s own critic is more severe than anyone else’s criticism. This is an internal conflict that can be changed. You may not be able to change other people, but the one thing you can change is your relationship with yourself. When you improve your relationship with yourself you will be different, in a positive way, with others.
A therapist is a resource for clients. When people have problems they have an option to seek out resources in their community no matter what their problem is, health, housing, financial, vehicle, etc.
Effective therapy enables clients to get the help they need and be independent.
Family, friends or co-workers may be disturbed by your conflicts and problems and get upset by the distress you are in. Often they have their own agenda or at least a different way of handling things. They do not feel what you feel. Things that get said cannot be unsaid. Your wish not to distress other people may get in the way of exploring yourself and your problems fully.
When working through conflicts with a professional your best interests remain the focus of attention. A psychologist helps you to fully explore your thoughts and access your feelings on the deep level. What you say and feel remains between you and your psychologist.
A psychiatrist is a medical doctor and works in the medical model or framework. The process is to diagnose and treat. The treatment is usually medication. Some psychiatrists have training in psychotherapy as well.
A psychologist works in the humanistic model or framework. A psychologist has a Ph.D, Psych. D. or Ed. D. (In B.C. some psychologists with MA’s became psychologists before a doctorate was required.) Most psychologists cannot prescribe medication. The process is to diagnosis and treat. The treatment is psychotherapy.